(Return of) The Well CXXI: Chris of Arabia - fire 'em in...

[Chris of Arabia]

Tiswas or Multi-Coloured Swap Shop?

Tiswas

[Funkfingers]

Hello. (Hello ... hello.)
Is there anybody in there?
Just post if you can hear me.
Is there anyone at home?

[Chris of Arabia]

Hello. (Hello ... hello.)

Hello?

Is there anybody in there?

Depends slightly on what you mean by "in", and "there" come to that...

Just post if you can hear me.

I post therefore I am...

Is there anyone at home?

Right now, yes; tomorrow not so much - of course, at that point we'd need to settle on a definition of "home"...

Come out from behind there; we can see you...

[Funkfingers]

Tear down The Well.

[Diego]

Sorry to indulge in the same topic, but what took you away from motorcycling?
You don't feel an itch? Or it's just Mrs. Arabia's influence doing her part?

Also, please name three musicians that should be slapped in the face, and explain why.

[Chris of Arabia]

Sorry to indulge in the same topic, but what took you away from motorcycling?
You don't feel an itch? Or it's just Mrs. Arabia's influence doing her part?

I still feel the itch occasionally now, but at the time, I think was clear that it wasn't going to be too much longer before I wrapped myself around a tree - they tend not to give way so much. I was also not too far from wedding #1 (not to Mrs of Arabia), and it was not longer practical transportation. Mrs of Arabia would take a very dim view of two wheels, and would certainly never ride pillion.

Also, please name three musicians that should be slapped in the face, and explain why.

Hmm.. let me think

#1: Billy Corgan - love the music Billy, but ya got to stop talking bollocks to the media every 5 minutes

#2: Adele - for the love of all that is holy woman, please learn to sing in tune

#3: John Petrucci - find yourself another vocalist will you

[dd12939]

How many belts do you own?

What is your favorite pair of boots?

If you were going to direct a movie about a musician who would you cover?

[GuitarStv]

Standard questions:

1. You're flying over some distant mountains when your plane goes down. By some fluke of nature all people on the plane survived. Two part question . . . how long do you wait for rescue before resorting to cannibalism, and how do you pick who should be eaten?
   
   
2. Apocalypse comes and you're short on food and trapped in your own neighborhood. Who on your street do you kill and eat first, and why?
   
   
3. You are a master chef working at a busy restaurant but times are tough . . . you don't have enough money to buy meat one day, but you discover that your best waitress has accidentally been locked in the walk-in freezer and frozen to death. What cuts do you take from the carcass, and how do you season/prepare the flesh in order make it tasty enough for your diners that evening not to notice anything's amiss? (Remember, the more dishes you prepare, the less chance that someone will find incriminating body parts in your freezer.)
   
   
4. The zombie apocalypse has come. Most people have fled their homes. Production of food in your country has stopped. Zombies roam the streets looking for a fresh meal, and you have escaped your quiet suburban neighbourhood with the rest of your family (let's say this is a typical family . . . 2 kids - one 8 year old/one 12 year old, and 2 parents).
   
   You enter a new town looking for food and are attacked by a chick. You manage to fatally wound the person, but before she dies, she tells you that she was an elementary school teacher and was trying to kill you to provide enough food to keep the surviving members of her class alive (there's no food in town). You also find out that she's been teaching the survivors from a classroom of 11 year olds to kill and cannibalize people passing by in order to survive. They've been doing this for a while now. She tells you where they are living, and to protect them.
   
   Do you risk your own families safety (and the safety of any other passers by) by ignoring the cannibals and hoping that they don't follow you? Do you risk confronting and executing the kids to guarantee your safety? Do you take the cannibal kids with you and try to teach them to be regular human beings again? What action or inaction would you take, and why?

[exnihilo]

What's it like being a minority?

cg

[Chris of Arabia]

How many belts do you own?

I'm not entirely sure, but I'd hazard a guess at around 20 assorted items

What is your favorite pair of boots?

At last count, I can only think of 3 pairs that I own; one pair of wellies, and two pairs of walking boots, of which I'd pick my light weight Berghaus as my favourites

If you were going to direct a movie about a musician who would you cover?

I'll stick with my first instinct and say "Steve Hackett" - something by way of a redress for the way in which he was treated in a recent BBC documentary on Genesis and its members.

[Funkfingers]

^
Need to check something before I comment on the extent of Hackett's involvement in that documentary. Also, the version transmitted on BBC television was edited.


MY QUESTION
When the MC at the Las Vegas Hilton used to announce that Elvis had left the building, where do you think that he had actually gone?

[Chris of Arabia]

Standard questions:


You're flying over some distant mountains when your plane goes down. By some fluke of nature all people on the plane survived. Two part question . . . how long do you wait for rescue before resorting to cannibalism, and how do you pick who should be eaten?

So long as there's a handy revolver available, I'll volunteer - I don't want to be part of anything that involves any violence.

Apocalypse comes and you're short on food and trapped in your own neighborhood. Who on your street do you kill and eat first, and why?

I would direct the honourable gentleman to my previous answer

You are a master chef working at a busy restaurant but times are tough . . . you don't have enough money to buy meat one day, but you discover that your best waitress has accidentally been locked in the walk-in freezer and frozen to death. What cuts do you take from the carcass, and how do you season/prepare the flesh in order make it tasty enough for your diners that evening not to notice anything's amiss? (Remember, the more dishes you prepare, the less chance that someone will find incriminating body parts in your freezer.)

Sounds like a good time to call the authorities to me

The zombie apocalypse has come. Most people have fled their homes. Production of food in your country has stopped. Zombies roam the streets looking for a fresh meal, and you have escaped your quiet suburban neighbourhood with the rest of your family (let's say this is a typical family . . . 2 kids - one 8 year old/one 12 year old, and 2 parents).

If you really must talk out of your arse, at least have the decency to give it some elocution lessons

You enter a new town looking for food and are attacked by a chick. You manage to fatally wound the person, but before she dies, she tells you that she was an elementary school teacher and was trying to kill you to provide enough food to keep the surviving members of her class alive (there's no food in town). You also find out that she's been teaching the survivors from a classroom of 11 year olds to kill and cannibalize people passing by in order to survive. They've been doing this for a while now. She tells you where they are living, and to protect them.

So this fantasy land you live in issues passports and let's you out into the real world does it?

Do you risk your own families safety (and the safety of any other passers by) by ignoring the cannibals and hoping that they don't follow you? Do you risk confronting and executing the kids to guarantee your safety? Do you take the cannibal kids with you and try to teach them to be regular human beings again? What action or inaction would you take, and why?

Bye, bye weirdo...

[Chris of Arabia]

What's it like being a minority?

cg

I've been a Stoke City fan all my life, I'm used to it

[Chris of Arabia]

^
Need to check something before I comment on the extent of Hackett's involvement in that documentary. Also, the version transmitted on BBC television was edited.


MY QUESTION
When the MC at the Las Vegas Hilton used to announce that Elvis had left the building, where do you think that he had actually gone?

My suspicion is he was really Kim Jong Ill and went and plugged himself into the same machine Toby Stevens had in Die Another Day

[Funkfingers]

Steve Hackett is Kim Jong Ill?

The Elvis line was a trick question. The MC went nowhere. He was still holding the microphone.

[VanDerchuck]

Who would you rather see fighting in the street, Margaret Thatcher vs. George W. Bush, Winston Churchill vs. Andre the Giant or Bob Harris vs. Dick Clark? Any era, any age, which and why?

[Chris of Arabia]

Who would you rather see fighting in the street, Margaret Thatcher vs. George W. Bush, Winston Churchill vs. Andre the Giant or Bob Harris vs. Dick Clark? Any era, any age, which and why?

I can tell that you guys must be learning a lot about me with this type of question...

[Funkfingers]

What would you do if I sang out of tune?

[VanDerchuck]

You have to put together a 5 person supergroup to open for a (yet another) one time Status Quo reunion. Who would you choose and why?

[d1dsj]

Hey Chris, happy New Year to you and yours. We know you have excellent taste and you have some fantastic gear, whats on the radar for 2015? What would be your bucket list rig ie 3 guitars, 2 amps and effects?