My first demo up!

That90'sGuy

That90'sGuy

DyzaBoyzologist
Hey guys, up for scrutinization is my very first song up on MySpace (as a solo artist). Everything (except for the drum loop courtesy of Apple Logic Pro) was performed by me as well as the recording. In 24 years I've never once sung and it shows (there's a reason why I'm not a singer), but I'd appreciate any and all honesty. And yes, the next program I'm saving up for Autotune, because I need it bad :D Anyhow, I thought some people would like to hear some good pieces of gear set in a recording setting (although very amateurish)... it's all in there... Fender (AVRI '62 Strat and MIA P-Bass)/Bogner Shiva/Nord Stage 88/Ampeg SVTDI box/Apogee Ensemble/API 3124+/Shure SM7B/Sennheiser MD-421 U5 and mixed on my Audio-Technica ATM-50s.

So here you go guys, my contribution to the forum, rip it apart! :friday:

www.myspace.com/chrisloganmusica

P.S. I'm mostly a rock/pop player, this song brings out more of my jazz/pop/funk side (I figure it'd be a good start)
 
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Re: My first demo up!

I don't know why you think you're not a singer, I think your voice is actually really good. It has a good timbre and interesting character. Since you've opened yourself up to constructive criticism, I'll offer my 2 cents.
With your vocals, it almost sounds like you're being too bashful and singing a little under your breath. Remember Tom Petty, Neil Young, and Bob Dylan made long careers with their less than ideal vocals. I'd recommend letting your voice fly, full and loud.
My only other criticism is that from time to time the timing seemed a bit off, ever so slightly. One last observation is that from time to time it sounded like each of the parts were battling to be heard. Decide where the main focus is and set the mix accordingly. You can't have the guitar, bass, keys, drums, and vox all at the same level.
Okay all the nasty stuff out of the way, I really liked the tune itself. I think you've done well with that funky guitar riff, very catchy. I really got into the bassline, very interesting and just plain cool.
I think for a fist attempt this was an unparalleled success. As with most things experience, and practice will yield better results. Seeing as you set the bar high for yourself I'm looking forward to listening to your next releases.
Great job,
Louis
 
Re: My first demo up!

loudriver23 said:
I don't know why you think you're not a singer, I think your voice is actually really good. It has a good timbre and interesting character. Since you've opened yourself up to constructive criticism, I'll offer my 2 cents.
With your vocals, it almost sounds like you're being too bashful and singing a little under your breath. Remember Tom Petty, Neil Young, and Bob Dylan made long careers with their less than ideal vocals. I'd recommend letting your voice fly, full and loud.
My only other criticism is that from time to time the timing seemed a bit off, ever so slightly. One last observation is that from time to time it sounded like each of the parts were battling to be heard. Decide where the main focus is and set the mix accordingly. You can't have the guitar, bass, keys, drums, and vox all at the same level.
Okay all the nasty stuff out of the way, I really liked the tune itself. I think you've done well with that funky guitar riff, very catchy. I really got into the bassline, very interesting and just plain cool.
I think for a fist attempt this was an unparalleled success. As with most things experience, and practice will yield better results. Seeing as you set the bar high for yourself I'm looking forward to listening to your next releases.
Great job,
Louis
Click to expand...

Wow Louis, thank you so much for not only taking the time to listen to it, but to critique it as well... it's much appreciated! :beerchug:

I can hear much of what you're talking about. I tried to bring out all the instruments to sit in at the same volume and I think that's probably far too distracting (I guess with other songs it was easier to pick out instrumentation, but this one I kinda liked it all and wanted it all to stand out). I guess the main emphasis on the song should be the guitars and bass (that's where the main melody for the song comes in and what should stand out the most). With that said, I think I put too much emphasis on the bass itself (I tried to get that loose, kinda grooving thing going on, but I think I mixed it too loud in the mix, it kinda steps over everything). As far as the beat goes, tempo has not always been my strong point, so it doesn't surprise me it's off in spots. I certainly have enough work cut out for me and maybe I'll give the vocal thing another shot not trying to suppress it so much (although it is scary - I've been spoiled by having some truly great singers in some of my projects in the past) :)
 
Re: My first demo up!

This is very good. In fact, very catchy stuff! The bass lines, the vocals, the drumming, not to mention the funky guitar work --- all of it is very cool. I really dig the BSSM-vibe on the guitar.
I agree with Louis, you can with advantage give more of yourself concerning the vocals. I am a big fan of deep bass sounds, but I would perhaps brighten it up a tad bit for this track, perhaps reduced the gain on it a little bit too... It sounds a little bit distorted to me. Can be cool, but I'd like to hear it cleaner for this song, personally. And reduced the volume a bit.. It overpowers the other instruments (including your voice) a bit.

I am not very experienced with making and producing music though, so I am not sure if I am off with my remarks or not, but what I do know, is that I like your song a lot. Good work!
 
Re: My first demo up!

Tor said:
This is very good. In fact, very catchy stuff! The bass lines, the vocals, the drumming, not to mention the funky guitar work --- all of it is very cool. I really dig the BSSM-vibe on the guitar.
I agree with Louis, you can with advantage give more of yourself concerning the vocals. I am a big fan of deep bass sounds, but I would perhaps brighten it up a tad bit for this track, perhaps reduced the gain on it a little bit too... It sounds a little bit distorted to me. Can be cool, but I'd like to hear it cleaner for this song, personally. And reduced the volume a bit.. It overpowers the other instruments (including your voice) a bit.

I am not very experienced with making and producing music though, so I am not sure if I am off with my remarks or not, but what I do know, is that I like your song a lot. Good work!
Click to expand...


Duly noted, thanks a lot Tor! You were definitely right on the accounts about the muddy bass and guitar tones.




---------


Ok guys, round 2 ;)


Remixed all the way. Less compression on the guitars and bass (less "dirty" if you will), volume automation adjusted on tracks (no more massive bass) and re-recorded the vocals this time not holding back (and was pleasantly surprised with the results - it seems I go less out of tune when I force myself to sing louder - although it still has a lot, A LOT of work...haha).

Hope you guys like this one even more, thanks for giving me the drive and motivation to make it better! :)
 
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Re: My first demo up!

loudriver summed it up much better than I could have. I like the vocals and the guitar, but they both sound a bit like you were holding back at least a little bit. That was an amazing first effort, and I can hear a lot of your influences in your playing and singing. I don't know much about recording other than clicking the red circle, and that it's a really steep learning curve. Keep at it.
 
Re: My first demo up!

Sounds good! Im just starting too, so I dont have too much feedback for ya on the recording side. Keep at it - you get better as you go. Gotta catch that moment and record it.
 
Re: My first demo up!

Thanks for listening and for the feedback all :)

I just uploaded a better version up there, if there are things that sound off, please let me know :) (the vocals are a million times better this time around, I guess perseverence kinda pays off there...haha).
 
Re: My first demo up!

totally dig the song bro...very funkadelic!!!

i'm definitely not one to give recording advice...but i think the bass line could use some more snap or definition if that makes sense?

that's one cool song you got right there man...cool as the other side of the pillow! :cool2: :) :cool2:
 
Re: My first demo up!

Hoss said:
totally dig the song bro...very funkadelic!!!

i'm definitely not one to give recording advice...but i think the bass line could use some more snap or definition if that makes sense?

that's one cool song you got right there man...cool as the other side of the pillow! :cool2: :) :cool2:
Click to expand...

Thanks man, now if I just had your vocal chords I'd be all set ;)
 
Re: My first demo up!

like someone said earlier...it's all about letting it all hang out vocally!

Petty/Dylan/Young...they are who they are because they let their voices become what they are and they put so much emotion into it...it makes it/them seem vulnerable and that's the draw...you know they are "all in" when they perform!

believe me...your voice isn't bad at all...i've heard bad...and that's not it!!!

keep at it...it's just like anything else...practice will make it better/more comfortable and easier for you to get out of it what you want and you'll find what works best for it/you!

to bad we don't live closer together...we could combine forces and rule a 90's music comeback!!! HAHAHAHA!
 
Re: My first demo up!

OK man, I will play the role of tough love for you:
Mr. Everything:

The mix is bad.

The drums need more level, and definitely more lows and low mids.

The bass has good EQ but I think it needs more compression.

Vocal needs to sound a lot less present --- try a delay or a reverb on there.

Right now it sounds very elementary, but it sounds like 3 parts, not like a song.

Maybe give your drum track a real hard hit on the 2 and the 4 --- you need that to anchor the song down. The sense of rhythm is just not there on that song --- you need the rhythm to be there to hold the song together.

You need a strong marriage to that 2 and that 4.

Guitar parts are cool, I like them --- I think you could stand to record them with a little less presence in the high mids. The guitar on Mr. Everything sounds like it's being played through a telephone or a practice amp or something. You need to fatten that up, whether by moving the mic closer to the speaker, or post equalization. I recommend re-recording; GIGO.
 
Re: My first demo up!

innerdreamrecords.co said:
I listened to the first one. Nothing to be ashamed of and with proper production, recording you would have a good one.
Click to expand...

Thanks innerdream, if you were to change some things, what would they be (I realize you do this for a living, but I would appreciate any advice)? When you're speaking in terms of proper production and recording, what specific aspects are you referring to? I guess the production end would be tightening up the beats making sure the instruments are played a little cleaner. Is the recording more about mastering the material?

ImmortalSix said:
OK man, I will play the role of tough love for you:
Mr. Everything:

The mix is bad.

The drums need more level, and definitely more lows and low mids.

The bass has good EQ but I think it needs more compression.

Vocal needs to sound a lot less present --- try a delay or a reverb on there.

Right now it sounds very elementary, but it sounds like 3 parts, not like a song.

Maybe give your drum track a real hard hit on the 2 and the 4 --- you need that to anchor the song down. The sense of rhythm is just not there on that song --- you need the rhythm to be there to hold the song together.

You need a strong marriage to that 2 and that 4.

Guitar parts are cool, I like them --- I think you could stand to record them with a little less presence in the high mids. The guitar on Mr. Everything sounds like it's being played through a telephone or a practice amp or something. You need to fatten that up, whether by moving the mic closer to the speaker, or post equalization. I recommend re-recording; GIGO.
Click to expand...

I like "tough love" ;)

In that song when it came down to picking out what instrument needs to sit back, I chose the drums (just because I found the guitar and bass parts so much more interesting). Perhaps, due to the feel of the song, it should be more upfront (listening back, I do miss it). To kinda bring out the funk, I had chose the strat because of its thinner tone, maybe a little more compression might thicken it up a tad (I decided on it as well because I wanted the lows and low mids to get more covered by the bass since I really wanted the riff to stand out). The singing can definitely stand to be brought down a bit... I had added a very light echo/reverb to try to make it sit back in the mix without it being too noticeable (I realize the only thing really noticeable is the fact that I'm a subpar vocalist at best).

I'll definitely have to play with the drums a bit though to get them into the mix better... thanks for the suggestions :) Now to play around with things :D



Update:

Remixed the song. Pulled back the vocals, upped the drums and changed the EQ a touch (did a small boost to bring out the kick and cymbals a little more). I threw on another compressor to try to slightly fatten the guitar (re-EQing just isn't possible, I have too much going on in the lower end than to be able to draw from that and the guitar needs the mid bump to cut in the mix) and set it back further in the mix (gotta make up for the energy and for the sake of the beat of the song, should be set further back). As far as micing the guitar, I'm a sucker for a few inches back because I like some space around the notes, when it's direct, it seems to lose something. So I guess the guitar is my biggest problem other than how out of tune the vocals are.
 
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Re: My first demo up!

good stuff!
can't say anything about recording, but as for mixing, i agree with some saying to lower the level of the vocal/add reverb. the first song, the bass is a bit to loose in your timing i think, but for the most part is pretty good. the second song on the other hand, is friggin' kewl! love everything about it, with the exception of the volume of the vocals.
again, good stuff:cool2:
 
Re: My first demo up!

Thanks innerdream, if you were to change some things, what would they be (I realize you do this for a living, but I would appreciate any advice)? When you're speaking in terms of proper production and recording, what specific aspects are you referring to? I guess the production end would be tightening up the beats making sure the instruments are played a little cleaner. Is the recording more about mastering the material?
Click to expand...

The material is fine, it's a good song. The biggest thing is you don't sell it well with this recording. I think you need to put a little umph into it in every aspect. The hard thing to do in recording is to transfer the energy to disc/tape. Even with production issues if the feel is there a lot can be forgiven. I think it helps to try and get in the head space of a live performance, imagine yourself selling it to an audience - get up for the game.
 
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