It really seems like pole and pickup height might be the problem, then. If you raise the bass-side pickup height (all you need is a screwdriver), you'll get more warmth and bottom end. If you lower the treble-side height, you'll get less brightness and bite. Then go pole piece by pole piece to taste.
I'm like you: I don't trust myself to install anything properly, so I had my luthier install the Black Winters in my Les Paul. At first I couldn't figure out why the bridge sounded thin and the neck sounded crazy-huge and overpowering. Then I figured out it was pickup height. I adjusted both neck and bridge and suddenly the guitar roared to life.