Emptiness with new group "F sub G"

[cream123]

let me know what you think

btw, yes, the group's name is a physics pun

F sub G is the name of the group
stands for Force of Gravity a.k.a Filthy Gangsters

the album is called Free Body Diagram

http://soundclick.com/share?songid=8975224

 

[Funkfingers]

Re: Emptiness with new group "F sub G"

Here is what I think.
1) Fishing for compliments is unprofessional.
2) In order to get away with using one riff for an entire song, you have to be either Lou Reed or, er, um, der. Nope. Only Lou Reed is cool enough to get away with that.
3) I think that the production is fine.

NOTE: I had the decency to listen all the way through. Most people that I know would have stopped the track within fifteen seconds.

 

[cream123]

Re: Emptiness with new group "F sub G"

Here is what I think.
1) Fishing for compliments is unprofessional.
2) In order to get away with using one riff for an entire song, you have to be either Lou Reed or, er, um, der. Nope. Only Lou Reed is cool enough to get away with that.
3) I think that the production is fine.

NOTE: I had the decency to listen all the way through. Most people that I know would have stopped the track within fifteen seconds.

lol, thanks for the constructive criticism.

there is a bridge but I know what you mean about the same riff. it is a bit rough draftish.

and the note seems to be about taste rather than improvement. unless you can give more constructive feedback as to what can be done to improve. I'm all about improvement and constructive criticism, so throw it down.

edit: the title thing was mainly just explanation although it did come as fishing for compliments, sorry if it seemed unprofessional

 

[Funkfingers]

Re: Emptiness with new group "F sub G"

Try changing key somewhere in the piece.

MIDI sequenced parts can be transposed. The rapper should still seem in tune because he isn't actually singing in the strictest sense. (Try pitch shifting his voice if you think it might help.)

Perhaps, I should apologise for my indifference? On the other hand, I am middle-aged and do not live in the United States. I do not relate to the song content on any level. Indifference is my honest reaction. No sale. Sorry.

NOTE: This is a "failure" on my part rather than yours. I am the wrong audience for F sub G. I suspect that a guitar-oriented forum is probably not the best place to air Rap recordings. Maybe, if you hired Astrozombie to overdub some lead guitar, the SDUGF would take more notice?

 

[everdrone]

Re: Emptiness with new group "F sub G"

heh nerd rap

pretty fun.

You can definitely hear everything so the mix is good in that respect. I like the big bassdrum cause it makes up for the lack of the bassline. Honestly for the lyrics Id turn the frown upside down some for the chorus - making it a bit more positive. I like the repeating synths and the echos on your voice for the chorus. Pretty interesting, keep it up dude!

 

[cream123]

Re: Emptiness with new group "F sub G"

Try changing key somewhere in the piece.

MIDI sequenced parts can be transposed. The rapper should still seem in tune because he isn't actually singing in the strictest sense. (Try pitch shifting his voice if you think it might help.)

Perhaps, I should apologise for my indifference? On the other hand, I am middle-aged and do not live in the United States. I do not relate to the song content on any level. Indifference is my honest reaction. No sale. Sorry.

NOTE: This is a "failure" on my part rather than yours. I am the wrong audience for F sub G. I suspect that a guitar-oriented forum is probably not the best place to air Rap recordings. Maybe, if you hired Astrozombie to overdub some lead guitar, the SDUGF would take more notice?

I appreciate the apology, and that is what I thought right after I posted what I did. not everyone is the market, and we are mostly just having some fun. but I appreciate the honesty.

 

[cream123]

Re: Emptiness with new group "F sub G"

heh nerd rap

pretty fun.

You can definitely hear everything so the mix is good in that respect. I like the big bassdrum cause it makes up for the lack of the bassline. Honestly for the lyrics Id turn the frown upside down some for the chorus - making it a bit more positive. I like the repeating synths and the echos on your voice for the chorus. Pretty interesting, keep it up dude!

yaeh, the chorus would be a good spot to turn around as such...its still a definite work in progress