Lost my wife of 20 years...

[NegativeEase]

Well, that is shocking and terrible. My heart goes out to you man, think on the good times and get some of the pain out through your music and other positive means.

[BloodRose]

Ive not been on the forum for a long time. And just seeing this. Debated whether or not to reply as wasnt sure if would be of comfort or stirring the memories due to time thats gone by.. But, im taking the chance to say my sincere condolences and I hope things have eased up some... My wife would put herself on the line to save even a stray, so I get it.. Anyhow, prayers for continued healing for you and the kids. AND, after losing my Son two years ago, I try, and tell my girls to try, to focus on the wonderful positive memories, instead of the loss...My wife and I too have had a similar sitch and she oft says we should write a book.. From that, the best advise I can offer is to cherish her memory even more for being your partner and warrior thru those hard times.. Peace and Love to you bro... Beautiful song by the way!.. Guitars can be therepeudic (I know I spelled wrong) and perhaps both the hurt and the memories will inspire more great music...

[Demanic]

The ones who love us always want us to go on living while we still can. Even if their part to play is done, they can still cheer us on from the sidelines.

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[Phantasmagoria]

Thanks for the kind words & encouragement. I don't see them ever forgetting her...she was so close to the two of them as were they to her. I know how much her loss means to them. She won't ever leave their hearts or memories (or mine) but moping at home won't solve or help with a thing. I know she'd be the last one to want us all to just sit around depressed all day long. I wanted to try and do something to lift their spirits a bit and I'm glad it worked out, at least to some extent.

[ErikH]

Guess we're doing ok all things considered, thanks for thinking about us.. Sorry to hear about your mom. Wish you & your family the strength to get through this tough time.

I took the boys out to dinner last night though none of us really felt like it. It was the first time we'd been out since she died. Ended up having a better evening/less depressing time than we expected,. We talked about her a lot, our situation & just life ..it felt almost like she was with us there.

This right here is the first step for you and the boys and a good sign you'll be OK. These moments right there will help take the pressures off and are really a part of the grieving process. She will always be with you in your hearts and memories. Never let them forget about her.

[Phantasmagoria]

So sorry to learn about such loss, the words are failing me, really. You still have a wonderful family to lead and inspire, your boys are now more than ever looking for guidance and you will be their island where they'll always find peace and certainty. Your late wife is already proud of you. Stay strong, it's not business as usual but you're a good man and good things happen to good people. God bless you and your family and may your wonderful wife rest in peace.

Thank you for your kind words and advice. Very nice of you to say so. I don't really have much of a plan going forward, Just want to be around for my boys & try and help them out to the largest extent that I can. I'd like them to make her proud & I know they will.

[AdrianSD]

So sorry to learn about such loss, the words are failing me, really. You still have a wonderful family to lead and inspire, your boys are now more than ever looking for guidance and you will be their island where they'll always find peace and certainty. Your late wife is already proud of you. Stay strong, it's not business as usual but you're a good man and good things happen to good people. God bless you and your family and may your wonderful wife rest in peace.

[Phantasmagoria]

Guess we're doing ok all things considered, thanks for thinking about us.. Sorry to hear about your mom. Wish you & your family the strength to get through this tough time.

I took the boys out to dinner last night though none of us really felt like it. It was the first time we'd been out since she died. Ended up having a better evening/less depressing time than we expected,. We talked about her a lot, our situation & just life ..it felt almost like she was with us there.

[Ascension]

How you holding up man? Lost my mother Thanksgiving day it was expected but still hurts. After going through the arrangements and all the emotions of that was thinking about you and thought I would pop over and see how your holding up?

[Phantasmagoria]

Honestly, the incident I mentioned above is one of many far, far worse. it's such a sordid tale, you wouldn't believe stuff like this could happen to anyone anywhere in the world ...yet it did. I didn't say we were all given hell before lightly.

[greekdude]

?????? man that's insane.. I have never heard such a story in our little corner in the balkans region. Home schooling can happen only in certain medical grounds, but this?

[Phantasmagoria]

This must be the hardest ordeal you are going through right now. As long as you and the boys are thinking of her, she will always be around guarding you like an angel.
PS
Just curious, cause I had my share of problems with my S as well, why home school? I am asking as a parent.

Thanks for the kind words & encouragement...much appreciated. I do know she will be around if it's even vaguely possible for her to be. Regarding the homeschooling thing as I said , we were threatened by her nephew who visited us at home ..this guy was 10 years younger than my wife & she used to love him like her own child.

His exact words were "Your son's school is pretty far away. It's a long ride (in the school bus) & it's not safe, anything could happen, maybe you should be worried about that". Long story short considering the people we were dealing with,what they had done to her after her father passed and their rich, colourful history, we were worried. The little one, my youngest, never went to school. He went straight from pre-school to home-schooling.

[greekdude]

I corrected my spelling again, Yup I am asking the reason for home schooling, if this is can be disclosed.

[dave74]

This must be the hardest ordeal you are going through right now. As long as you and the boys are thinking of her, she will always be around guarding you like an angel.
PS
Just curious, cause I had my share of problems with my S as well, while home school? I am asking as a parent.

Sorry to ask, I'm not trying to be the grammer police for which i would certainly fail lol.

Are you asking him;
Why to home school? or,,,,,
Why not do home schooling?

[greekdude]

This must be the hardest ordeal you are going through right now. As long as you and the boys are thinking of her, she will always be around guarding you like an angel.
PS
Just curious, cause I had my share of problems with my S as well, why home school? I am asking as a parent.