I remember in my 20s and 30s questing for something called "the sound in my head", but in retrospect it was just G.A.S. and lack of knowledge. Now several decades on, I find I'm less picky about my tone. I can get most gear to work.
If you read TGP you are left with the impression that a bunch of old men are engaged in a high stakes game of cork sniffing. For me, the opposite has occured. I'm less particular about my gear.
For instance... I know the kinds of pickups that work for me. I could probably pick 5-10 different pickups from the Dimarzio and Duncan catalogs and be fine with any of them. For that matter, even stock pickups can sound pretty great. I find that if you buy a pointy guitar, it usually ships with the kind of pickups a pointy guitar player would want. If you buy a vintage guitar, it usually ships with the kinds of pickups a vintage player would want. Maybe guitar electronics have gotten much better, but I've been pleasantly surprised with stock pickups and don't have an urge to "rip them out".
Same is true with amps. I know the kinds of speakers I like. I know how to use EQ and boost pedals. I also know that when I play something long enough, my ears and expecations morph so that I'm able to get the best from what I'm using. I have some amps, some effect processors, some plugins that work just swell and I don't think my life will be enriched by changing to something else.
Even if something is not amazing (like the reverb on my amp), it doesnt really matter to me. It does what it does, it doens't mean its time to buy a new amp. I actually prefer delay, but if I don't have a delay pedal handy, I will just turn up the reverb and live with it.
There are only a couple things I am picky about. Fret work and intonation. And things that are defective, like scratchy pots and loose control jacks.
I thought this came from experience and confidence, but over on TGP you've got some high order cork sniffers who are probably boomers. So maybe other people go in the opposite direction.